Thread: Two-minute review of Promised Land starring Matt Damon and Frances McDormand.

A picture named posterNarrow.gifWhat could be bad about a movie starring Matt Damon and Frances McDormand, that was written by Damon and directed by Gus Van Sant? What could be bad? Just about everything. 😦

There were two jokes in the movie. The first one they spoiled in the movie itself, and the second was in the trailer. The one Damon told had Damon’s charm. Both appear in the first ten minutes of the movie.

After that it was all downhill.

The plot was taken out of the Handbook of Hollywood Scripts and then twisted so it made no sense. In other words they couldn’t even get the standard plot right.

  • The plot: Corporate asshole falls in love, finds he has a conscience, struggles, decides to do the right thing, gets the girl.
  • The plot: Jerry Maguire, which I really loved, however with none of its charm, or coherence. Or Renee or Cuba. 🙂

However, this time the reviewers got it right.

I don’t understand how a movie can suck as much as this one did.

They had a great idea — let’s expose fracking — something that’s very important. That, and $9 billion corporations suck the life out of people and communities. And if you want to show us how, great — but they didn’t.

There were two people conversing loudly during the coming attractions, and I was thinking Oh this is going to suck. After the first half hour of the movie I thought they were more interesting than the movie.

My eyes were rolling so often I just decided it would be simpler to leave them permanently rolled. They are rolled right now in fact.

In case it isn’t completely obvious: Skip this one.

PS: It did have a great poster. Probably why I was suckered into seeing the movie.

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About Dave Winer

Dave Winer, 54, pioneered the development of weblogs, syndication (RSS), podcasting, outlining, and web content management software; former contributing editor at Wired Magazine, research fellow at Harvard Law School, entrepreneur, and investor in web media companies. A native New Yorker, he received a Master's in Computer Science from the University of Wisconsin, a Bachelor's in Mathematics from Tulane University and currently lives in Berkeley, California.
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